Blog Posts

Category: Self-Care

toxic masculinity

Raising Our Sons to be Human: Fighting Toxic Masculinity

No man stands so tall as when he stoops to help a child. – Abraham Lincoln The term “toxic masculinity” has been around for decades. At its root, it is defined as the belief that masculine attributes are inherently undesirable–sometimes even evil–and that “manliness” has a negative impact on women, children, and society as a

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have your people

We All Need People; Who Are Yours?

“You must trust and believe in people or life becomes impossible.”  ~~Anton Chekhov There is a scene that has been immortalized from “Grey’s Anatomy”–do you know which one I am referring to? Two friends are seated at a bar when Cristina matter-of-factly tells Meredith that she put her name down as an emergency contact. “The

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making time for ourselves

Making Time for Ourselves

“It’s okay to take time for yourself. We give so much of ourselves to others, and we need to be fueled both physically and mentally. If we are in balance, it helps us in all our interactions.” — Faith Hill This summer, I have been taking things a little easier on myself. As you may

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porn and shame

Breaking the Cycle of Shame

“If we can share our story with someone who responds with empathy and understanding, shame can’t survive.” ~ Brené Brown Recently, I was out to eat with a friend when her teenage daughter called several times in a row. My friend knew it was important or her daughter would not call repeatedly. She stepped away

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managing anger

Healthy Ways to Handle Anger

“Anger helps straighten out a problem like a fan helps straighten out a pile of papers.” — Susan Mancotte What makes you angry? Do you fume when someone cuts you off in traffic? Does your blood pressure skyrocket when your child refuses to cooperate? Regardless of what sets you off, anger is a common and

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hobbies add to happiness

Hobbies Add to Our Happiness

“Doing what you love is the cornerstone of having abundance in your life.” ~ Wayne Dyer Recently, I went to the funeral of my friend’s father. I have–fortunately or unfortunately–been to my fair share of funerals in my short life. They can be uplifting and inspiring, as they celebrate the whole life of the honored

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porn affects ALL relationships

Porn: The Secret Intruder on Relationships

“When sex becomes easy to view, love becomes difficult to find.” ~Fight the New Drug There was once a Dutch biologist named Nikolaas Tinbergen who made a fascinating conclusion through a famous experiment. He created cardboard cutouts of butterflies that were attractive to their mates by color and movement. He decided to paint these cardboard

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body positivity for kids

Gifts Parents Can Teach Their Children, Part 1: Body Positivity

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson I know someone who has been working on herself for a while. As a dancer, she has dealt with all sorts of body image issues for the majority of her life. Her motivation

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Transforming Body Negativity into Body Positivity

“You can’t hate yourself happy. You can’t criticize yourself thin. You can’t shame yourself worthy. Real change begins with self-love and self-care.” — Jessica Ortner  Every day we see pictures of what the “perfect” man or woman *should* look like. While we may think these are just images that we view and move on, the

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self harm pic

Self-Harm: More than Just Cutting

“People say things / meant to rip you in half / but you hold the power to not / turn their words into a knife / and cut yourself.” ― Rupi Kaur Trigger Warning: This post contains explicit descriptions of self-harming behavior and may be triggering to some.  Educating my clients has become an important

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20 min couple walks

20 Minutes to More Connection

“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” ~Mignon McLoughlin Next week is Valentine’s Day–the day of love. Chocolates, roses, lingerie, jewelry, romantic candlelit dinners…you will see it all across your social media platforms. If you and your partner are in the trenches or in a season of rebuilding

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The “Yes…and” Principle of Self-Compassion

Self-compassion is simply giving the same kindness to ourselves that we would give to others. — Christopher Germer I will never forget a client I saw years ago. On the surface everything seemed okay and she had checked off all the boxes of a career, marriage, family, children, etc. Yet she was struggling with PTSD,

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Melissa Cluff, MS, LMFT, CSAT

Melissa Cluff is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist based in North Texas, providing face-to-face and telehealth therapy options to clients in Texas.