The days seem to blend together in this Groundhog Day that is COVID-19 quarantine. I would like to suggest six questions that will cause introspection and perhaps prompt you to certain actions that will lift your spirits.
Hi, again. It’s me, still in quarantine. How are you doing? Hanging in there? I know, this entire situation is crazy and uncertain and continues to cause anxiety for everyone on so many levels. Hopefully we are getting closer to having some light at the end of the tunnel!
Until then, I want to urge you to continue to take good care of yourselves. I have spoken with friends, neighbors, family members and clients who have collectively said that the days blend together and leave them in a slump. It is so easy to feel that way when you are living the real Groundhog Day! Here are some questions to ask yourself daily to help make the most of this time in quarantine:
- What am I grateful for today? I have written at length about gratitude because I firmly believe in the power gratitude has on the mind. Seeing the silver lining, or the good in any given situation, can change your attitude or feelings about something–even something difficult like being in isolation for weeks on end. So ask yourself, what good has come from today? Was there a peaceful moment with children? Did you enjoy a nice meal in which you were not rushed? Were you able to be productive while working in the quiet of your own home? No matter your circumstances, you can find something to be grateful for–even if it is simply being healthy and alive. I encourage you to do this exercise every day!
- Who am I checking in on or connecting with today? I spoke with a friend who told me she was checking her phone more often than usual. She thought about why she was doing this, and realized it was because she was hoping to hear from someone. She was craving interaction with another human. I have written about the Japanese concept of amae which describes the human necessity to connect with and feel love from others. We are all hard-wired to have meaningful connection with those in our lives, and it can be challenging when the natural occurrence of physical contact is completely removed from your life. So, be like my friend: Instead of wallowing in your loneliness, recognize that you want contact with the outside world, and make contact. Check in on a family member, friend, coworker, or neighbor. I promise you that connecting with others will give you a helpful emotional boost!
- What expectations of “normal” am I letting go of today? Whew, this one has been hard for me. I thrive off of being productive–which I thought came from being outside the home working, running errands, meeting up with people, etc. I have had to adjust my expectations and set aside some of those past perceptions. My big shift came when I realized I could be productive at home. I do not have to be outside the house to be productive, and neither do you. I have actually found it nice to hunker down and enjoy some time at home! So, if you are feeling frustrated because of the changes isolation has brought, try to let go of some of your expectations (and then refer to number one). Leaning into this new isolation “normal” is really all we can do right now! Just for the record: I am not suggesting we let ourselves go and Netflix + chill all day. As an example, my brother is feeling depressed because he cannot go to the gym and work out. I urged him to let go of that expectation of his old daily normal, and adapt/adjust. Go on a walk or a bike ride, create a home gym with what you have, or access any of a million free at-home workouts. Resenting quarantine will do you no good; let go of your past expectations for a moment and make the most of what you have today.
- How am I moving my body today? I wrote about quarantine exercise last week. The fact is, physical exercise can and will be your saving grace during quarantine. The benefits to exercising in general are endless: Reducing your risk of disease, increasing energy levels and boosting productivity, ameliorating mental health, enhancing sleep quality, boosting creativity, upgrading sex life, raising mood and body image, and fostering happiness. This is because exercising has a beneficial physiological effect on the brain and the body. Whether you have a vigorous exercise regimen, or take power walks around your neighborhood, there are many ways to exercise and your day will certainly be brightened as you make time to do so!
- How am I getting outside today? I will admit, the first part of quarantine was particularly difficult for me. Amidst all the confusion and worry that came with COVID-19, the weather was crummy and I was not able to spend time healing in nature. But now that things are literally brightening up with springtime, I invite you to spend more time outside. Being outdoors can clear your mind, lift your spirits, motivate you, improve your mental health, and better your mood. Rest assured, getting outdoors during quarantine will do wonders for you! Just today I enjoyed exploring some new trails by my house and found a new secret place of beauty. I can not wait to go back and visit it and find other hidden gems that I have missed.
- What beauty am I creating or inviting into my life today? I follow a DIY extraordinare on Instagram who lives by the phrase, “Less scrolling, more creating,” and I love that. She recounts a time where she scrolled through her feed a lot. Though she was admiring everyone else’s home DIY accomplishments, she realized it totally zapped her creativity…as well as her confidence and happiness. Once she realized this, she started limiting her social media time and coined that phrase she now lives by. Happiness comes from being creative–either by creating it or viewing it. So ask yourself–how can I be creative during quarantine? Is there an activity that you used to wish you had time for that you can do now? Maybe it’s painting, calligraphy, writing, playing a musical instrument, or a million other creative outlets, spending time being creative is sure to boost your happiness!
I have been using these six questions as a trial run in my personal life, and I can attest to their efficacy. There have been several times when I used these to check in with myself, and I realized that getting outside or connecting with someone was exactly what I needed at that moment. So please, write these questions down on a sticky note and place it somewhere you will see it often. As you continue to take good care of yourself, you will make the most of this uncertain quarantine time. Let’s be able to look back on 2020’s quarantine and know we did the best we could with the time and resources we had!
Melissa Cluff is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist based in North Texas, providing face-to-face and telehealth therapy options to clients in Texas.
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- Cluff Counseling: Sanity-Saving Exercises During Quarantine
- Cluff Counseling: Teaching Your Little Ones The Art of Gratitude
- Cluff Counseling: You Are Blessed: A Simple Gratitude Challenge
- Conscious Lifestyle Magazine: “How to Harness the Power of Gratitude:
6 Key Principles”
- CRC Health: Why Nature is Therapeutic
- HuffPost: “The Transformative Power of Gratitude”
- GratitudePower.net: “The New Science of Gratitude”
- Greater Good Magazine: “Pay it Forward”
- Greater Good Magazine: “Why Gratitude is Good”
- Medline Plus: Benefits of Exercise
- Outside Online: “It’s Time for Doctors to Prescribe Outdoor Therapy | Outside Online”
- Psychology Today: “The Healing Power of Gratitude”
- Psychology Today: “The Power of Nature: Ecotherapy and Awakening”
- WebMD: “Do You Need a Nature Prescription”